Magdeleine: <-- wondering vaguely if there's any porchfic
shannono: I've read it
Lysandra: Lena, if not, you should write some
Brandon: Shannon, we should put porch smut into an Alt. For Lena.
Lysandra: but there must be smut.
shannono: we should
shannono: front porch swing at Mrs. Scully's
Lysandra: And dedicate it to her.
shannono: now THAT'S an alternative
Lysandra: For the inspiration
Brandon: while dinner is being prepared
Magdeleine: <so touched, I'm weepy>
Brandon: waiting for Bill jr to arrive.
Lysandra: And dedicate it to Mike too.
shannono: Act of Idiocy??
Brandon: Act of Hubris
Lysandra: Act of Sibling Rivalry
Brandon: only if Bill & Tara were goin' at it in the other porch
Lysandra: dueling Scullys
shannono: early morning, I'd say ...
Brandon: "You think you're hot shit, Bill? Watch THIS!"
Lysandra: Mom as judge
Magdeleine: disguised as an East German judge?
Lysandra: LMAO over here as this gets sillier and sillier....
Brandon: Mulder & Tara might have to comfort each other before it
shannono: *picturing Mrs. Scully holding up posterboard signs with
numbers on them*
Magdeleine: The Scully Olympics
Brandon: 6.9, of course
shannono: of course
Lysandra: The Porcholympics!
Magdeleine: musta been the dismount
Lysandra: Style points
shannono: "Wow! What a dismount!"
Lysandra: point again
Brandon: "Look at that giant slalom!"
shannono: "That's gonna cost 'em, Bob"
Lysandra: *That's* gotta hurt.
Brandon: "ooohh....premature ejaculation! that's gotta be a big
shannono: "Can she come again? They're going for a new world record!!"
Lysandra: And......nope, she didn't swallow. That's a penalty.
Magdeleine: "Ohhhhh, no, he can't get the condom package open! That's
gonna take at least a point off..."
Brandon: now we move into the compulsory part of the exercise....
Lysandra: I beg all of us to get therapy
shannono: "Whoops ... looks like they're gonna be disqualified, Jack"
Magdeleine: this IS our therapy
Brandon: and the crowd goes wild!
Lysandra: And it's so cheap.
shannono: "Yeah Bob, he just can't keep it up tonight ..."
Magdeleine: "I don't remember when I've seen a couple this enthusiastic
about the oral preliminaries!"
shannono: "It's a pressure situation"
Lysandra: If he blows his wad now, surely he'll be weak in the next round...
shannono: "They need a 9.9 to bring home the gold ..."
Brandon: "boy! talk about your standing broad jump!"
shannono: <--- scaring the neighbors again
Lysandra: "If he keeps this up much longer, they're definitely going
have to test him for steroids, Dick."
Brandon: "The difficulty rating for this position is only 1.5, so
they're going to have to really hit it just right if they want
to stay in contention."
shannono: "No, wait! They're adding a double-twist!"
shannono: "I've never seen that done just that way before, Bob!"
shannono: "This is amazing!"
Lysandra: It's a photo finish!
Lysandra: (And Shannon prolly has the URL)
shannono: "Let's check the clock on that last orgasm ... it's neck-and-neck
Brandon: Remember, angle of penetration is everything with this maneuver.
shannono: "And the Mulder/Scully team pulls it out!"
Lysandra: So to speak.
Brandon: "...and gets it all over the floor."
shannono: so to speak
shannono: save this
shannono: save this chat
Brandon: email it to PBB.
Lysandra: I DO NOT give my permission for this to go in The Den.
shannono: and Sara
Magdeleine: Oh God, this is so going up in the Den
shannono: no it's not
Lysandra: It is SO NOT.
Magdeleine: It is SO.
shannono: oh, what the hell? okay by me <g>
Lysandra: Just send it to out little egroup.
shannono: yeah, send it to babyfishmouth
shannono: then we'll all have a copy <g>
Lysandra: I think Erly might enjoy it also.
Magdeleine: who exactly is the pronoun involved in "send it"? Me?
Brandon: we could email it to Shannon's mom, too
Lysandra: And Shannon's mom and gramma.
Brandon: And Lena's mom.
shannono: Mom would probably appreciate it
shannono: The Sex Olympics
Magdeleine: not my mother...
Lysandra: Thank God my mom's dead; this would kill her.
shannono: <--- slowing sliding down in my chair
Lysandra: that sounds painful... I think.
shannono: <--- glad I didn't leave a while ago and miss the Porch
shannono: gimme a damn break, it's late
Magdeleine: I think you have a lot of material for an Alt, here...