100 WAYS TO KILL DIANA FOWLEY
       --composed by Lena, post-Biogenesis
 

Brandon: We need some Die! Fowley! Die!
Magdeleine: How shall I kill her?  Let me count the ways.
Magdeleine: 1) hanging
Magdeleine: 2) shooting
Magdeleine: 3) drug overdose
Magdeleine: 4) strangling
Magdeleine: 5) beating
Magdeleine: 6) FIRE FIRE FIRE
Magdeleine: 7) more poison
Magdeleine: 8) dissection
Magdeleine: 9) make that vivisection
Magdeleine: 10) tie her to some train tracks and bring on the Amtrak, baby!
Magdeleine: 11) throw her from a balcony
Magdeleine: 12) bury her in the snow in the Antarctic
Magdeleine: 13) hurl baseballs at her head
Magdeleine: 14)  Jump on a desk in the Hoover Building, wave a thousand bucks, and yell, "BRING ME THE HEAD OF DIANA FOWLEY!!"
Magdeleine: 15) Send her to Vegas with the Lone Gunmen
Magdeleine: 16) ...and they leave her in the desert to die like the dog she is
Magdeleine: 17) Take that bra of hers and wrap it around her neck until her eyes pop out
Magdeleine: 18) your good old-fashioned electrocution
Magdeleine: 19) Nuke the bitch.
Magdeleine: 20) Give Scully a scalpel and stand aside!
Magdeleine: 21) Shish-ke-bob.
Magdeleine: 22) boil in oil
Magdeleine: 23) empty elevator shaft
Magdeleine: 24) torn apart by wild dogs
Magdeleine: 25) decapitation
Magdeleine: 26) disembowelment
Magdeleine: 27) drop a TV on her head
Magdeleine: 28) better yet, an anvil
Magdeleine: 29) sabre saw
Magdeleine: 30) drowned
Magdeleine: 31) poured in concrete
Magdeleine: 32) flayed alive (like that one)
Magdeleine: 33) Three words: Cask of Amantillado
Magdeleine: 34) pull out all her hair and stuff it down her throat
Magdeleine: 35) swallowed by giant python
Magdeleine: 36) the death of a thousand cuts
Magdeleine: 37) crucifixion
Magdeleine: 38) stake through the heart
Magdeleine: 39) impaled
Magdeleine: 40) suffocated
Magdeleine: 41) Dropped out of airplane w/out parachute
Magdeleine: 42) Launched into space w/out spaceship
Magdeleine: 43) wood chipper
Magdeleine: 44) chain saw
Magdeleine: 45) hung upside down by the toes
Magdeleine: 46) walking the plank
Magdeleine: 47) burned at the stake
Magdeleine: 48) stripped naked and whipped until raw, then rubbed with salt
Magdeleine: 49) Tiger tiger tiger!
Magdeleine: 50) starved to death
Magdeleine: 51) Your basic stoning
Magdeleine: 52) lots and lots of needles
Magdeleine: 53) poisoned douche
Magdeleine: 54) Electrocution by shorted-out vibrator
Magdeleine: 55) toaster in the tub.
Magdeleine: 56) Houdini's water-escape trick w/out escape
Magdeleine: 57) attempts to play her mind games on another Pusher
Magdeleine: 58) firing squad
Magdeleine: 59) attacked by rabid rats
Magdeleine: 60) Black oil, o'course
Magdeleine: 61) Cut her in half
Magdeleine: 62) Misguided "smart bomb" finds her instead of Kosovo
Magdeleine: 63) botched lobotomy
Magdeleine: 64) put in a spiked barrel and rolled down a hill
Magdeleine: 65) sent over Niagra Falls
Magdeleine: 66) eaten by a tree  (This is, after all, The X-Files)
Magdeleine: 67) Turn the bitch inside-out.
Magdeleine: 68) acid... lots of it...
Magdeleine: 69) Stuffed in a box and sent back to where she came from
Magdeleine: 70) hit by truck
Magdeleine: 71) alcohol poisoning
Magdeleine: 72) put into a room with US for five minutes
Magdeleine: 73) pour water on her and the bitch'll melt
Magdeleine: 74) shake & bake
Magdeleine: 75) arrows
Magdeleine: 76) spears
Magdeleine: 77) broadsword
Magdeleine: 78) sent to the moon and LEFT THERE
Magdeleine: 79) Put in a trailer park during a tornado
Magdeleine: 80) Lighning
Magdeleine: 81) rubbed with peanut butter and sent among starving squirrels
Magdeleine: 82) feed her to the monster under my bed
Magdeleine: 83) chokes on force-fed bagels
Magdeleine: 84) drop her on her head just like her mother used to do
Magdeleine: 85) wet-wire upload and let fanfic do away with her
Magdeleine: 86) Ebola
Magdeleine: 87) radiation poisoning
Magdeleine: 88) pecked to death by parrots
Magdeleine: 89) Vacuum-packed
Magdeleine: 90) Avalanche
Magdeleine: 91) exsanguination
Magdeleine: 92) El Chupacabra
Magdeleine: 93) "purified" by religious fanatics
Magdeleine: 94) Trash incinerator (or compactor, for that matter)
Magdeleine: 95) sent into a baaaad part of Chicago with $100 bills stapled to her
Magdeleine: 96) Nice, neat boomerang thwack
Magdeleine: 97) rubbed w/ honey & staked out over an anthill
Magdeleine: 98) Lips sewn shut and put in a room with lots of chocolate
Magdeleine: 99) killer bees
Magdeleine: <drum roll, please>
Magdeleine: 100) LEMME AT THE BITCH!!!!!!