***DISCLAIMER***: All "X-Files" elements and references
in this story belong to Fox Broadcasting, Chris Carter,
and 1013 Productions, and I am making no money from it.

ARCHIVING: Link only, please!

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Convergent
by shannono
shannono@iname.com


Vignette, MSR, Rated PG, Spoilers for "Millennium"

Summary: A kiss and a promise.

Author's notes: Post-ep number one, in the spirit *I* got from
The Kiss. Further insanity, including some smut, to follow. ;)

Thanks: To Paulette, Lisa, and Robbie, for beta services rendered.
Love ya, dolls!

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Convergent
by shannono


Where to start?

Well, at the beginning, I suppose. All the good stories start there.

Once upon a time ...

Yes, I know; it's a cliche. That's all right. So is the ending.

Once upon a time, I had a dream. Not the kind of dream you have at
night, nestled all snug in your bed. This was the kind of dream you
build in your own mind, in those hours when you sit and stare at a
wall, or out the window, or at the yellow dashes etched on your
vision as you drive down yet another lonely highway.

My dream -- a pipe dream, I guess most would call it -- might not
be what most would expect of me. I mean, I give off this air of
single-mindedness and egotism, sometimes edged with a flare of 
insanity. I think big, wrapping every little tiny event up in 
the ribbons of interstellar conspiracy.

It's what I do.

But it's not who I really am.

My dream was alarmingly ... normal, for want of a better word. And
it was made up of everything I was so sure I could never, ever have.

First and foremost was my sister. Yes, that wish had become a part 
of "the big picture"; was really the reason for the path I'd taken. 
But at the foundation of my never-ending search was the pure desire 
to have a sister. A family. A nice, simple, normal, nuclear family. 
Dad, Mom, Brother, Sister. If I couldn't have all that, then at least
my sister.

Then I wanted friends. Not paranoid conspiracy buffs and internet
geeks, but regular, upper-middle-class types. Suburb dwellers, with
wives and kids and minivans.

Of course, I'd have to fit in, right? So I wished for the same
thing for me. Well, maybe not the minivan. But the wife and kids.

Maybe for that most of all. A wife, a woman by my side always,
looking after me, taking care of me, letting me take care of her. 
Loving me -- mentally and emotionally and physically. Great sex, 
sure, but secondary to the rest of it. The security of loving and 
being loved.

I wanted a normal, "safe" kind of job. College professor, maybe,
or even a practicing psychologist. Or an author, writing about
conspiracies instead of living them.

And then, suddenly, I had my dream handed to me on a silver
platter. The suburb, the friends, the wife and kids. Even my 
sister, with the extra bonus of nieces and nephews. I was stunned,
but amazingly receptive. Feeling rather like a cross between
George Bailey and Ebeneezer Scrooge, I floated through the story
in fast-forward, watching my life progress in snapshot moments.

And in the end, my life was worthless. 

I have never felt more empty than I did in the moment when I
realized what I'd done. To myself, to the world, but most
especially to Scully.

In that instant, my pipe dream dissolved into so much sand at my 
feet. And a new one took its place, this time based in reality.

My new dream, my deepest hidden wish, sprang into my mind fully 
formed. And at its center was this brilliant, strong, beautiful 
woman who pulled me back from the abyss yet again.

I see us together, following the same parallel paths we've been 
on for the past seven years, side by side but almost never
touching. Only now, our paths will be convergent. We'll grow
ever closer, reach out more often, share those parts of ourselves
we've held back.

And by the time we reach the end, when we've saved the world and
ourselves in the process, our paths will be one. And we can turn
some of our attention away from what's ahead of us and toward 
each other.

Of course, that doesn't mean we can't ever spare each other a 
glance before then. I'd like to think it's inevitable that we'll 
end up together when it's over, but I'd also like to think we can
do a little exploration before we reach that point. Something to 
sustain us for the journey; bread and water for our souls.

So it was midnight on New Year's, and everyone in the world was 
grabbing the person next to them and laying one on them, mostly 
in meaningless tradition. And as I looked at her, her smiling
face upturned to watch the Times Square pandemonium, I knew it 
was time for one of those glances.

And so, cliched or not, I kissed her. And she kissed me.

We kissed, and it wasn't passionate or sexual in the least. It 
was soft and tender and loving, and it meant more than all those
other traditional kisses going on all over the world put together.
It was traditional, yes, but it was the farthest thing from 
meaningless. It meant everything. It was a promise, and a 
fulfillment of a promise, and a little glimpse into the future.

And it was enough.

What? You were expecting "they lived happily ever after"? No, I
wouldn't go that far. We don't have that kind of life.

But we do have a life. Together. And right now, that's enough for 
me.

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