Title: Fade Away(1/1) Author: RM >lbontger@wmcstations.com< Disclaimer: Mulder and Scully belong to CC, 1013, and Fox. No fringe is intended. I do not own this song either. SPOILERS::::Pilot Sumamry: A rainy night and familiarity. Dedicated to Pandora, for giving me this song and having the confidence in my abilities to write a fanfic that would do it justice. ~~~~~ Fade Away ~~~~~ "I want to hold the hand inside you I want to take the breath that's true I look to you and I see nothing I look to you to see the truth. . . Fade into you, strange you never knew Fade into you, I think it's strange you never knew..." --Mazzy Star 'So Tonight That I Might See' ~~~~~ There was silence. That was the thing she noticed first, after the occasional sounds of airplane and business, the thrum of engines, and the nonstop musings of a man bent on a case. Walking from the small, propeller plane's stairs, to the airport inside, she caught the dizzying smell of Southern thuderstorms, and she breathed it in with quick tight breaths. Mulder dashed toward the airport's open doors as the first few drops landed around them. At the entrance, his body safely sheltered by the overhang, he looked back to her with a an odd look on his face. She was walking normally, gliding through the increasing shower without disturbance. He realized she *liked* the rain. ~~~~~ It was quiet in the car too. The thrum of the wheels on pavement and the hush of rain and thunder were their companions, keeping a steady downfall of water. She relaxed into the feel of heavy thunderstorms and night. Pulling up to their motel, she found she was glad that their case did not really start until tomorrow, that they could simply relax tonight, go over it slowly, slowly, just as the rain made it's way from the heavens with such langour and laziness that it soothed her right to the soul. Thunder crackled and lightning split up the sky, showing her Mulder's hasty form as he ran through the rain to the office. It was streaking across the windshield, washing away thought as it cascaded down the sides of the car, giving her comfort with the presence of power and nature. Hearing the tap, the steady fall of rain everywhere, the whisper of wind, made her content. It made her changed, made her want to relax, to drift away into a place that was somewhere between sleep and conscious thought. It eased her into this place with remarkable speed, shifted her from agent to woman with surprising ease. Woman . . . languid, soft, wanting a touch, needing a breath of love. She sighed and was jerked from her reverie by the door clicking open and Mulder's wet, tired body sliding into their car. He shivered and turned up the heater, even though it was a summer thunderstorm and already muggy. As heat blasted at them, Mulder shivered in the cold damp of his body and drove around the side to their rooms. They had an upstairs connecting room, with windows that faced the back wilderness beyond. The stairs leading up was protected by its location in the center of the building and through the dim passage, she could see all the way to the inner courtyard and the pool dancing with rain. She and Mulder pulled their luggage upstairs and separated to unpack, get settled, deposit their belongings in their places. She found a balcony in her room, with a small sliding door that led out to the concreted structure, two deck chairs already set out. She peered closer and noticed that the white plastic chairs were not wet, and that rain only spotted the outside edges of the enclosement. Sighing, she realized it had a roof. She hurriedly pulled off her traveling pantsuit and pulled on a pair of cool jeans, and a cotton short sleeved shirt. With obvious pleasure, she slipped out to the balcony. Dropping into the chair, she perched her bare feet on the railing and closed her eyes, breathing in burning ozone and the fresh natural feel of storms. It made her slip right back into herself, slide down the layers of agent and professional and doctor that made her Scully, back to the inner light and fundamental beliefs that made her Dana. Her body relaxed as her mind wandered. She saw images behind her closed eyes, her father reaching out to her at Christmas, picking her up, swinging her around for a huge hug. There was her mother holding her in Sunday morning church as she fell asleep in her lap, and her sister taking up for her when she wanted to play with her brothers. Her younger brother Charles, his grin when he got to tease his older sister, and then Bill when he had stood in front of her to protect her from the school bully. It made her feel childlike, made her slip back to innocence and warmth and good things. There was the rain again, their first case when she thought he had to be so off the wall, so crazy, that nothing could save him. Standing in the rain, letting it pour over them, the lost time and the orange 'X' on the road. Innocence even then. Not knowing the full extent of what she had committed herself too, yet determined she would be honest, she would back him up. She would back him up. It all pooled around her, infused her damp body with memories and thoughts. She was fading away into the past, letting rain and time catch her. And then a hand touched her face and she bolted upright, eyes opened to reveal intense fear blue. Mulder placed a hand to her shoulder, squeezed it softly. "I thought you'd be coming over," he said, and moved to sit in the chair next to hers. She said nothing, but remembered their unspoken agreement for her to come to him, let the case unravel between them. "It's beautiful out here," he murmured. So then he felt it too. The surreal nature a thunderstorm could create, the tug of the past on her. She looked over at him, at the way his wet hair hung in his eyes like unruly strands of freedom, at the way his fingers curled softly over the arms of the deck chair, at the way his eyes seemed to melt into nothing. "I was remembering our first case, the rain." "I told you a lot of things that night," he said. She frowned, then smiled. She had been thinking of being *in* the rain, while he had remembered being in the motel, with the lights out and her hearing his life in her robe and her fear. She turned to see him, showed him her laugh. "I *showed* you a lot of things that night." He grinned and took her hand across the small space between them. "Sure did, but I was pretty calm despite it." "Except for the fact that it took you about a full minute to look all over me before you realized what I was doing." "Hey, I was just making sure you were okay." She smiled again, felt the warmth of his hand in hers, the cool caress of the rain. Lightning lit the sky and revealed the dark trees. He stood and leaned against the balcony railing, watching her directly, placing a hand to her feet and rubbing them absent-mindedly. She tilted her head and wiggled her toes. "You were so young then, Scully." He seemed almost sad, almost as if it was his fault she was older now. "I was pretty green," she replied. "Not only that, just young. I was afraid I had done something, afraid your young energy would get you in trouble. I wasn't afraid that you were a spy, although that did come up, but more that you were young and ready to take on the world." She sighed. "I still feel that way most times." He grinned suddenly. "And you gave that back to me, too." She glanced up at him with surprise, then stood, coming to sit beside him on the rail, making her jeans damp. She smelled soap on him, saw that the damp hair was because of a shower, saw his clean white feet gleaming against the concrete. He slipped an arm around her waist, pulled her briefly against his chest with a quick friendly hug. She didn't pull back, simply rested her cheek against him and looked out at the sky. She was slipping back again, swimming through the currents of herself back to the primal soul place that made her think and feel what was true and real. Think and feel and act. He seemed to find her there too. Mulder pushed off the rail and stood next to her, taking her deeper into his embrace and running his hands along her hair. Her eyes closed and she breathed in soap and rain and green things and Mulder things, letting the thrill of touch heat her through. His palms were heavy along her face, fingers finding her scalp and massaging sleepiness deep into her. Then her forehead came to his shoulder, her arms curled in, so that she was completely wrapped in him, recieving comfort. He began humming, breathing out a melody with the life that stirred the hair in his fingers, the music touching her soul. She was fading into him, fading down down down into his nothing asked embrace, slipping further into herself and therefore, further into him. They swayed, began to dance softly, smoothly, bare feet brushing against cold concrete, bodies melted together into one being. She thought the song might be "Close to You" and began murmuring the words under her breath. "Just like me . . . they long to be . . . close to you. . ." Dancing out in the rain, barefoot, with the humidity and the closeness and the thunder making her dizzy. In this, she knew, she knew. Funny how she had never known before, strange how his eyes hadn't given it away every time he looked at her. His lips were gentle on her skin, light as rain, slipping down her nose, reaching her mouth with caution, then abandoning that for the heat rippling through. Strange how the kiss seemed to make them fade away . . . ~~~~~ end adios RM