Disclaimer:  Yeah, right, like they're mine. 

Category: SRA
Classification: Scully/Other, Mulder/Other, MSR
Rating: R
Archive: Gossamer. Others ask me.
Feedback: Knock yourself out. 
Summary: Scully leaves the FBI in an attempt to have a normal life.
Author's Note:  The lyrics used at the beginning of each part are 
all from Stevie Nicks, the wonderful singer, songwriter and 
modern day goddess. If I could have access to her closet for a
week, I'd die a happy woman.     

"Far and Away"
by Lisa  
(haven599@msn.com) 

"And the days go by
Doing nothing about them . . . 
How much time
will I have to spend?"

    Scully ran her fingers over the raised print on the business 
card again and again.  It belonged to a man she had met at a 
seminar three weeks ago.  He offered her a job, in fact, and she 
told him she'd think about it, but was just being polite.  Now, 
she was considering it more and more each day.  The job was with
the CDC in Atlanta.  They were looking for top medical professionals
to assist with a special project.  That project involved development 
of a cancer classification system, a disease in which she had had 
firsthand knowledge with during her lifetime.  
    Scully had become more and more interested in its prevention
and treatment since her own recovery.  Her background in forensic
pathology seemed to set her apart from other possible candidates.  
A chance to really use her medical training.  Science.  Facts and
figures.  Outcomes. Very different from her work now.  
    Ever since they were reassigned to the X-Files Mulder seemed 
even more intent on finding the truth.  What Scully didn't expect 
was Agent Diana Fowley's presence in their quest to find the truth.
It seemed she was always involved in their investigations.  Scully 
was increasingly feeling like a third wheel.  She and Mulder both
agreed on how to proceed with the current case every time.  It's like
they were completely in sync with each other's plan and way of doing
things.  
    Scully felt alone and isolated from her partner.  She also
wondered if Mulder and Diana were involved again.  It was none 
of her business, but she didn't trust Fowley and feared Mulder may
get hurt.  That's what bothered her the most.  If he wanted to be 
with her, there was little Scully could do about it but witness 
the process unfold.  That would be too unbearable. 
    This opportunity was the chance to have a normal life.  It was
waiting for her. She just had to take the first step.  

****
    Mulder walked into the office on time for a change and looking 
like he was in a good mood.  "Scully, we're going to South Carolina."
he said excitedly.  
    "Why?"  she asked sitting at his desk, absently fingering a pen.
    "This time I know it's an X-File." he boasted.  "I'll tell both 
of you about it on the plane." 
    "Both of us?" Scully questioned.  
    "Yeah. Diana, too."  Mulder started grabbing some files and 
shoving them in a empty briefcase.  
    "Why is she coming?" 
    "To help us with the case."  he replied.  "Why else?" 
    "Mulder, I thought *we* were assigned to the X-Files." Scully 
commented.  
    "We are.  She's just providing some extra help."  Mulder assured
his partner.  
    "For the past couple of months?" 
    "What's wrong, Scully?" 
    "I just think . . . " 
    "You're jealous." Mulder grinned. 
    "That's not true." she snapped.  Maybe a little, she thought. 
    "Whatever, Scully.  C'mon, go get packed." He grabbed the 
briefcase and headed for the door.  
    "I can't."  Scully announced.  "I'm busy.  Sorry."  
    "Yeah, right.  Too busy for work."  
    "I'm sure I can find something to work on that doesn't waste
the Bureau's time and money."  Scully explained.  "Besides, the 
two of you didn't need me back then and you don't now." She 
brushed passed him and up the stairs.  
    Mulder stared after her in disbelief.  He didn't expect those 
harsh words coming from her.  He also didn't expect them to hurt
as much as they did. 

****
    Scully took the next few days while Mulder was away to call Dr. 
Allan Gabriel and inquire if the job was in fact still available.  
It was. She made arrangements to come down to Atlanta and meet with
him.  Also, she put things in motion to relocate to the South.  Her
new employer said he would mail her some information to her about the 
CDC and its location along with a map of the city.  
    The next day Scully went to see Skinner and explained the events 
of the past few weeks.  
    "I'm sorry.  I had no idea you were so unhappy."  he commented.
    "I feel it's time for me to move on.  I need a change."  Scully 
stated with as little emotion as possible.  "If it's feasible I'd 
like to leave for Atlanta for a few days to touch base with the 
people I'll be working with there."  
    "I can understand you want a change, but what about Agent Mulder?"
Skinner pointed out.  
    "Mulder will be fine by himself, sir."  Scully replied.  "Of 
course I'll tell him."
    "You haven't said *anything* about this to him?"  Skinner thought
she would have discussed this important decision with him, given 
how close they were.  
    "I just haven't gotten around to it.  We've both been so busy."
    "Of course."  Skinner said, but wasn't so sure that was the 
reason.  
    Scully got up from the chair and started to leave.  
    "Scully . . ."  he began softly.  "Good luck.  I'm sure you'll
do well.  I hope you're appreciated as much at the CDC as you are
here."  
    "Thank you, sir."  Scully said.  "I'll let you know when I get 
settled."  she opened the door. 
   "I'd appreciate that." he replied.  "Take care." 
    "I will."  Scully saw unexpected emotion in his eyes. "You too."
she added.  

****
    Mulder got back from South Carolina about two hours ago.  The 
investigation didn't go as well as he'd hoped.  The residents of the 
small southern town were not as forthcoming with information.  It 
was reported that the military were doing secret experiments on 
many of the women.  They had developed a rare form of cancer.  
    Mulder suspected that the government was involved and perhaps
would lead him to some more information about Scully's cancer and 
subsequent remission.  He never got a chance to explain this to her
before she made her feelings clear about Diana.  
    Scully was right, Diana had been more involved in the X-Files
lately.  He liked it.  It was comfortable.  They both thought along
similar lines.  She was more open to extreme possibilities, but he 
missed Scully playing devil's advocate.  Sometimes the reality of 
science was what he needed to keep him in check.  
    Mulder had been lying here on the couch thinking how he had been 
taking Scully for granted lately.  Her science.  Her truths.  Her 
presence.  He was going to tell her first thing in the morning how 
much he appreciated her.  He'd been an asshole recently and was 
going to do his damndest to remedy that.  
    There was a soft knock at the door just as he was drifting into 
a light sleep.  
    "I know it's late, Mulder, but can I come in?" Scully asked. 
    "Sure."  
    Scully was unsure how to begin to tell Mulder this.  She'd 
been agonizing over it for days for the right words, fearing his 
reaction.  Upset?  Shock? Surprise?  She played out scenarios 
out in her mind every night before she fell asleep.  
    "Scully?" 
    "I'm leaving the Bureau."  she stated matter-of-factly.
    "What are you talking about?"  He faced her.  A look of 
astonishment written on his face.  
    "I've accepted a job with the CDC in Atlanta. I'm leaving 
tomorrow to look for an apartment."  Scully explained.
    "Just like that."  
    Scully relayed to him about the seminar and the doctor whom
she met that was looking for another researcher to join his team.
    Mulder heard her, but wasn't listening.  He couldn't believe 
she was leaving.  How could she do this to him?  "You're just 
telling me now?" he asked.  "Why, Scully?" 
    "I . . . I didn't get around to it earlier.  We've been so busy
lately." 
    "Bullshit.  You know it."  Mulder replied.  
    She was startled by his words.  "I need a change, Mulder." 
    "I guess that's a good enough excuse.  You're punishing me 
because of Diana's involvement with the X-Files."  Mulder answered.
    "Not everything is about *you*."  Scully remarked. "This is for me." 
    "I'm sorry you had to put up with me for so long."  He was hurt. 
This seemed so unlike her. 
    "I have a lot to do."  Scully said softly.  "I've got to go."  
    "Wait . . . Can I help you do anything?  Pack or something?"
he offered.  
    "I haven't found a place to live yet.  I'm going to stay in a 
hotel  while I look.  If I need any help, I'll let you know."  Scully 
appreciated his offer.  She could tell he was upset with her news.
She knew he would be.  
    "All right."  he mumbled.  
    "I'll see you in a week or so."  
    Mulder nodded.  
    Scully left his apartment trying to hide the tears in her eyes. 

****
    Scully spent the week orienting herself to her new job and the 
city of Atlanta.  Her co-workers seemed nice and helpful.  The 
same thing couldn't be said about Atlanta.  She was having a little 
trouble finding her way around the city.  The apartments were 
expensive, even more so than Georgetown.  She was considering a
couple places in Buckhead, but hadn't finalized any plans yet.  
    She found herself thinking about Mulder and their conversation 
in his apartment.  It was just like him to think this was about 
Diana Fowley.  Ok, maybe it was a little, but she had a right to 
her feelings.  It seemed they were going in circles and not finding
the truth at all.  Mulder feels the truth is out there, but if that's 
the case, it's so cleverly hidden from them.  She was having a 
real hard time believing they would come across anything remotely 
resembling the so-called "truth."  It's not that she wished Mulder 
would fail, but he needs to come to terms with reality.  That may 
not happen soon and she needed to get on with her life. But, why did 
she feel like she was taking the easy way out?

****
Scully's apartment
Georgetown, DE 

    The apartment was empty.  Today was the day.  Scully had finished
the rest of the packing with a little help from Mulder.  They didn't 
say anything to each other during the process except when he wanted
to confirm what box her items were supposed to go in.  She just wanted
to get on with her new life.  
    "I guess that's it."  Scully announced.  The movers left about 
fifteen minutes ago.  She and Mulder were double checking her 
apartment.  
    "I'll just send anything I find to you."  Mulder told her.  
    "As soon as I get to the hotel I'll call you."  Scully was 
staying in a hotel until her new apartment was ready.  
    They stood there looking at each other, unsure of how to say 
good bye.  Mulder made the first move, wrapping his arms around
her in a long embrace.  "I'll miss you."  he whispered against her 
hair, before letting her go.  
    Those words echoed in her head during the long drive.

****
Embassy Suites 
Atlanta, GA  

    Mulder was on his second drink at the downstairs bar.  Scully 
had called him, giving him the phone number and address of the 
hotel she was staying.  He just had to see her one last time and 
got the next flight out of Dulles.  She didn't know he was here 
and was trying to gather up the courage to make in up to her room.
The alcohol was making it a little easier.  
    Scully was about to crawl into bed when someone was at her 
door.  No one knew she was staying here.  Maybe it was an employee
who mistakenly thought she ordered room service.  
    "Mulder,  what the hell are you doing here?" 
    "It's nice to see you again, too."  he remarked, making his 
way into the room.  
    "I just had to see you again, Scully."  he mumbled.  "Before
you left me for good."  
    "You've been drinking."  she stated.  
    "I've been at the bar, yes." he said. "But not drunk."  
    "I think you need to get some sleep.  Are you staying here, too?"
Scully was tired and didn't need this right now.  
    Mulder was really trying to accept this.  "I want you to be happy
and if this will do it, then it's better you're here.  It's better . . ."
    She wasn't sure she remembered what happiness was anymore. 
"Is that what you came all this way to tell me?"  she asked. "You
could have told me that on the phone and saved yourself the trip."
    "I couldn't have done this over the phone."  He kissed her 
lightly on the lips.  
    Scully's mind flashed back to the hallway before the bee stung
her.  Was this what it was going to feel like?  It was good, but . . . 
she pulled away from him.  "Mulder, what's gotten into you?"
    "What's wrong with a good bye kiss?" 
    "As I recall we already said our good byes."  she remarked.
    "It wasn't enough for me, Scully."  He touched her cheek, his 
fingertips brushing her hair. "It wasn't enough." 
    It wasn't enough for her either.  The hug seemed so inadequate
to what they've been through together, but there were boundaries 
to be respected.  Rules to be followed. 
    Mulder moved his arms around her waist anchoring her against
his body.  He pressed soft kisses on her forehead, her eyelids, her 
cheeks.  Until his lips made their way to hers.  This kiss was much 
different than a few moments ago.  Mulder's tongue made its way 
into her mouth, devouring hers .
    It happened so fast, Scully thought.  Mulder's body touching 
hers.  His warm hands gliding over her back.  His mouth all over
her.  He smelled like whiskey and something else, not really cologne, 
but . . .  Maybe it was just his scent.  She'd never been this close
to him before to know.  Whatever it was, she was under its spell.
    They both slid down onto the bed, Mulder's fingers working on 
unbuttoning her pajama top. His lips against her neck then her 
collarbone.  He stopped and untangled himself from her, sitting on 
the edge of the bed.  
    "We can't do this."  he told her. "I don't have anything.  Any 
protection." 
    "Hmm . . . What?"  Scully was slow to catch up.  Her body was 
still tingling from Mulder's lips, but her mind knew he stopped. No,
don't stop, Mulder.  Don't stop she thought.   
    It was funny. Now he was being the sensible one and she was  
ruled by her emotions.  
    Scully shook her head.  "It's Ok, Mulder. Really."  She wound 
her arms around his waist, pressing herself against his back. "I 
trust you with everything." she whispered into his neck. "Everything."
    That was the last conversation they had that night.  They didn't 
need words.  Each seemed to know what the other wanted.  The 
absence of communication was communication in itself.  They spoke 
the language of devotion to each other. 
    They made love that night with a passion kept stifled way too 
long.     
         
****
    Mulder stood at the window, opening the curtains a little and
stared at the traffic below.  He got out of the bed a few minutes
ago, fearing Scully would wake up and tell him to leave.  That it 
had been a mistake.  They shouldn't have made love.  Somehow it 
seemed fitting that this happened when she was leaving.  Hell, she 
was already gone. 
    He turned to watch her sleep.  She looked beautiful.  It was 
still hard for him to believe last night really happened.  This 
should be a beginning, but instead was the end.  
    Mulder went over to her, leaning down, kissing her gently on 
the forehead.  
    Scully stirred and opened her eyes.  She smiled up at him. 
"Hey," she mumbled.  This was so awkward.  They were separated 
now, but she felt closer than ever to him.  
    Mulder pulled on his shirt, walking across the room.  
    Scully picked up her top from the bedside floor, hastily buttoning
it, walking over to her lover.  The look in her eyes conveyed a 
message of uncertainty.  She rested her head against his chest.
    "It wasn't long enough."  he said softly.  
    Scully was unsure if he was referring to the night or their 
lovemaking.  Or both.  God, this was so hard.  "You could stay for
a day or so."  she suggested. 
    "It will only make it harder." Mulder told her.  
    "I know." she whispered.  "I'm going to miss you so much."  
    Mulder gathered her in his arms.  "I miss you already."

****


"Dreams of loneliness . . . 
Like a heartbeat . . . drives you mad . . . 
In the stillness of remembering what you had . . .
And what you lost"
 
    Scully quickly settled into a routine.  She felt like she was 
doing something that really mattered.  Her work as part of the cancer 
surveillance team was very interesting and relevant to the health
of the public.  She worked closely with Robin Ingram, an 
epidemiologist who had been with the CDC for five years.  She 
was used to dealing with environmental toxins, not chronic diseases,
but convinced Dr. Gabriel to give her a chance in this field. 
    Robin was about ten years older than Scully with short dark brown
hair and green eyes, her best feature.  She had two teenage girls
and a wonderful husband named Bill.  They had been married
for almost 25 years and she often relayed little anecdotes
to Scully about their marriage.  
    Their current project was developing and enhancing a standardized
cancer staging classification system that was compatible for cancer
registries and screening programs. 
    Cancer registries collect and process information on individuals 
diagnosed with cancer, including the site of the tumor, stage at 
diagnosis, morphology and treatment issues. Demographic information
was also collected and from this predictions can be made on what 
specific population may be more prone to developing the disease.
    Scully's work involved the pathology of the disease and its 
characteristics. 
    However, lately they had been bombarded with samples of cancer
cells and were running statistical analyses on them.  Anyway, it was
tiring but rewarding work.  Scully was almost too tired at the end 
of the day to think about Mulder.  
    Almost.
    She had two theories.  The first being that Mulder really cared 
for her, maybe even loved her, and needed to show her.  But, if 
that were true, then why didn't he tell her earlier?  However, she
wasn't too forthcoming with her feelings either.  
    Secondly, it was a mistake and Mulder didn't want to tell her 
that morning.  They were caught up in the moment and couldn't 
stop.  Perhaps he felt that if they made love, she wouldn't take the
job and stay with him and the FBI.  Mulder must have a very high 
opinion of himself if he believed that.  

****
    Weeks passed and Scully never heard anything from Mulder, 
despite emailing him her new address and phone number.  He 
could have at least acknowledged that he received it.  
    She called to touch base with Skinner and he sounded the same.
He didn't say much about Mulder and she wasn't going to pry, even 
though occasionally she wished her former supervisor would say
Mulder's miserable and doesn't know what to do without you, Scully.  
    But he had Agent Fowley to keep him company.  Scully was certain
she'd be more than willing to assume that role.  Jealousy would get 
her nowhere.  It was going to stop.  No more.  That was her old 
life.  She had to let it go.  The sooner the better.  

****
    Mulder didn't realize how much he missed Scully until she was 
gone.  Wasn't that how the old adage went?  He felt like something
was missing.  It was.  She wasn't here by his side.  
    It was a mistake.  Instead of a beginning it was an end.  He didn't
plan on seducing Scully.  Seducing Scully?  She wouldn't allow 
herself to be seduced unless . . . she really wanted it to happen. 
    He expected her to get mad and throw him out of the room.  
It was just the opposite.  Those words she said - trust, everything,
left him unable to respond.  No witty comeback for that one, nor
did he want there to be.  Scully had summed up their relationship 
in two words.  Hearing her say that in the same breath and then 
offering her beautiful body to him was too much to resist.  
    Mulder had held himself back long enough when it came to 
Scully.  
    Now, if they never saw each other again he knew how it felt 
to make love to her.

****
    "So, Dana, are you going to see him again?" Robin asked her 
as they were having their requisite morning cup of coffee.  
    "Chris?" she asked.
    Robin swallowed the hot liquid carefully before nodding her 
head. 
    "I don't know.  I hope so."  Scully replied.  She had literally 
run into Chris Reberdy in the parking lot of her apartment building.
He was pulling out of a parking space and Scully ran into the back
of his car.  She had been distracted and looked down for a minute.
That one span of inattention cost her.  
    They had exchanged insurance information and addresses, finding
out they lived in the same complex.  She was attracted to him instantly
and ended up getting passed the initial anger and awkwardness of the
driving mishap. He was just a little shy of six feet tall with dark 
blond hair and was wearing a light blue shirt that seemed to be the 
same color as his eyes.
    Chris Reberdy, an Atlanta native, was always interested in medicine
and becoming a doctor, but decided in his sophomore year of college
decided he would much rather teach science to young people who loved
it as much as he did.  He was a biology professor at Emory University 
for the past ten years.  
    Chris was very surprised to learn that Scully was a doctor and 
even more intrigued that she worked for the FBI.  To him, the FBI
was an elusive organization, something he was only familiar with 
through movies and TV.  Actually meeting a former federal employee
and a beautiful one as well made her all the more captivating. 
    Scully chose her words carefully when telling Chris about her 
time at the bureau.  He couldn't understand all of what she'd been
through and she couldn't open up to a stranger easily.  Not when 
she didn't trust him just yet.  
    "Well . . . " Robin began, shaking Scully out of her reverie.
"You're smiling, something I haven't seen you do in awhile."  
    Scully added another package of sugar to her half empty cup.
"I am happy."  she admitted.  "And have a feeling I'll see him again."
    "Oh . . . before I forget.  In two weeks, we have to go to that 
conference."     
    "What conference?"
    "It's kind of boring, but the CDC has it every year.  It's a 
chance to network with other professionals in the other field offices
and see what they're doing.  Too many meetings, but at least we get
the evenings to ourselves." she explained.
    "It's not in Atlanta?" Scully inquired. 
    "No.  D.C."  Robin stated.  "Where you're from.  Maybe you'll 
even see some friends."  Robin tossed the Styrofoam cup in the trash. 
    "Maybe."  Scully smiled weakly.  She wouldn't see Mulder. He 
will probably be out of town.  Anyway, it was for CDC employees only.
How would he even know about it?   

****
    Diana Fowley had one goal.  It was to get Fox Mulder back, 
any way she could.  The X-Files was the way to accomplish that
task.  She was interested in them and the man behind them even 
more.  Right now this seemed much more fun than profiling 
terrorist and terroristic activity overseas.  
    She broke it off with him because he was too obsessed with
the X-Files.  His work became his life.  There was always some 
theory, angle, or question he needed to look at.  He never relaxed
and consequently never had enough time for her.  She was instantly
attracted to him and that skewed her judgment for awhile.  Back  
then she was young and naïve, not able to control the relationship 
the way she wanted to.  Now, she knew exactly what she wanted
and had the means to get it. 
    They would be the perfect pair.  They thought alike with respect
to the X-Files.  Both open to extreme possibilities.  She didn't mean 
marriage, but if she had to do that it would be just a minor 
inconvenience.    
   Since the X-Files existence became known, he has done everything
in his power to prove there is an underlying conspiracy at work to
thwart the truth as he sees it.  
    Well, there was a conspiracy, but he needed to move on with
his life.  She was just the one to help him along.  Working with
Fox again, she would be able to steer him away from things
he shouldn't find out.  There are certain things he doesn't need 
to know.  At least not yet.  Perhaps never.  
    Diana realized she has some more work to do to get him to 
trust him completely and that would take time, but their history 
together offers her some advantage.             
    Truth.  Trust.  Fox places too much emphasis on those words.  
    She'll tell him what he wants to hear.  That should be easier 
now that Agent Scully left him.  She was never his ally. 
Science and the X-Files work at cross purposes, anyway. 
    Diana's purpose was to have Agent Mulder all to herself.  This 
would be much easier now that Agent Scully was out of the picture.  

****


"Time casts a spell on you . . . you won't forget me . . . 

    Mulder really didn't think it would happen again, but it did. 
He didn't plan for it to happen.  Not at all. 
    Diana had been trying her best to start their relationship up
again.  It didn't work the first time, so it sure as hell wasn't going
to get better the second time around.  
   Part of him thought that maybe Scully would come back.  Not 
take that job with the CDC, but it has almost been six months 
and she must be happy there.  
    It's not like he didn't try to contact her.  He did. Well, 
almost.  Countless times he picked up the phone, only to hear 
her soft voice on the other end of the line.  He just couldn't bring
himself to say anything.  She was the one who wanted to leave
and he would just be making it harder on himself by trying to 
rekindle something that wasn't there in the first place.  
    Except for that one night.  
    Mulder tried to think of it as saying good bye. One hell of 
a good bye.  Did he really think she would stay with him for the 
rest of her life?
    Diana was comforting him after a case.  It seemed like a routine
missing persons case except all the victims were young women between
the ages of 30 - 35 years old.  Mulder was desperately trying to find 
a connection between the women.  Every time he thought he found 
something another factor would pop up that had to be ruled out.  
    Some of the women were raped, some weren't.  Some had red 
hair, some didn't.  Some fought back, others didn't.
    The last victim looked so much like Scully.  She had red hair
very similar to hers.  Beautiful skin.  Beautiful blue eyes.  He 
kept thinking if that happened to Scully.  He wouldn't be able to
deal with something that horrific.  It would destroy him.
    Mulder had no one to turn to except for Diana.  She knew that
and he did too.  It just happened.  All of a sudden he was in a 
relationship again.  The familiarity was comforting in a way.  
    Now, Diana had all but moved in with him.  She was very 
professional at work, no one had any idea they were personally
involved.  Since they were partners, using only one car was 
believable and the office was downstairs in the basement, so arriving
together was hardly even noticed.  
    Mulder wondered if that could have happened with Scully, if 
she stayed.  Could they hide it? Assuming there would have been
a relationship to conceal.  
    The sex was good with Diana, but nowhere near the passion
and tenderness he felt for Scully. 

****
Hampton Inn
Manassas, VA 

    "So, you bored yet?"  Robin asked as she open the door to her
hotel room and proceeded to flop down on the bed.  
    Scully followed her friend into the room.  "I don't know how 
much more I can take."  she confessed.  "At least it's only one 
more day."  
    "Let's go out to dinner."  Robin suggested.  "It'll make us 
feel better."  
    "Why not?" Scully replied.  "Give me ten minutes to change."
    "No problem."  Robin headed into the bathroom. "Just knock
on my door when you're ready." She called through the closed 
door.
    Scully had been apprehensive during this whole trip.  Afraid 
that she'd run into Mulder and it would be awkward.  Part of her
wanted to see him again, just to know that he was doing all right.
    She changed into a sleeveless lavender dress and grabbed a 
sweater in case it was cold in the restaurant or wherever they 
were going.  Maybe she was too dressed up.  Sometimes she got 
bored with the business look.  Slowly, she was trying to change
her wardrobe from the dark-colored suits to dresses and skirts. 
During her time at the FBI it wasn't really an issue, but now she
welcomed change in all its forms. 

****
The Olive Garden Restaurant
Falls Church, VA 

    The Italian eatery was a popular spot in the small town. The 
restaurant was separated by archways leading into rooms each with
its own Italian name.  Plants set upon the top of stone borders 
divided off each section and also offered a little privacy to the 
dining parties.  Soft music drifted from above and added to the
ambience of the establishment.
    The crowd was light tonight, mostly couples, but a few families
were enjoying a rare weeknight outing with their young children.
Waiters and waitresses scurried around, their trays loaded with 
steaming hot entrees waiting to be consumed by hungry customers.
    Scully and Robin were glancing over the menus when their 
waitress appeared with two glasses of red wine.  
    "I love this place."  Robin commented.  "And I'm going to 
order my usual - the lasagna."  
    "I can't decide between the Fettucine Alfredo or the Chicken
Scampi."  Scully admitted to her friend. 
    She ended up getting the Chicken Scampi and was satisfied
with her choice.  They rehashed some of the more interesting parts
of the conference and discussed some of what they had to accomplish
next week.  There was a timeline that had to be followed to keep 
on schedule with their project enhancement of cancer registries. 
    It was halfway into the main course when Scully saw him. 
    Mulder. 
    He was accompanied by Agent Fowley and they looked pretty 
cozy at the small table.  He looked the same.  Scully wondered if 
she should go over and say something.  It would be rude not to and 
sooner or later Mulder would recognize her. 
    "I'll be right back."  Scully offered no other explanation to her
friend and quickly left the table, before she lost her nerve. 
    "Scully,"  Mulder began.  "What are you doing here?"  He was
a little flustered, not believing she was actually standing right in 
front of him.
    "I'm in town for a conference."  she stated. "I . . I just saw 
the . . . two of you of here. . . "
    "How's Atlanta?"  Diana interrupted.  
    "Fine. Good."  Scully could feel Mulder's eyes on her.  She 
felt uncomfortable and seemed to fumble over her words with 
the two of them right in front of her.  If it was just Mulder maybe 
conversation would come easier.  Maybe not.  
    "That's good."  Diana replied.  "It was nice of you to stop by 
*our* table."
    Scully got the hint.  "Well, my food's getting cold."  She 
glanced at Mulder one last time before letting them enjoy 
their coffee.
    "Friends of yours?" Robin asked when Scully rejoined her.
    "Yes."  she nodded.
    "Well, it was nice they were here so you could visit." 
    Scully tried to manage a smile.  
    During dinner, Scully tried not to look their way, except for
surreptitious glances towards Mulder.  She was trying to pretend 
it didn't bother her that he and Fowley were here together. Any 
minute, Scully expected him to come over and asked to speak to
her in private.  If Robin noticed she was on edge,  she never
said a word.   
    After they indulged in Tiramisu and Cappuccino, Scully was headed
to the restroom when Mulder found her.  He wanted to speak to her
outside for a moment. 
    She followed him out to the patio.  There were two small tables,
each flanked by four chairs, occupied by couples enjoying a drink
before their meal.  The trees were adorned with small white lights
and the same music was pumped through the outside speakers. 
    "How are you doing?" Mulder asked when they had found a private
corner to talk.
    "Fine, just like I said."  She crossed her arms in front of her,
defensively.  
    "You look nice." Mulder noticed she was dressed differently
than he last saw her, or maybe it was because she was enjoying an 
evening out.  
    "Thanks."  she mumbled.  "So, the two of you are still working 
on the X-files?" 
    "Yeah.  Things are pretty much the same."  Mulder told her. 
"How long are you going to be here?  Maybe we could . . ."
    "I've got a flight back to Atlanta tomorrow evening."  
    "Oh.  I understand."  he muttered.  Mulder watched the light
breeze play with her hair.  She moved it behind her ear, but the
wind still had its way with a few loose strands. 
    Mulder closed the distance between them and enfolded her in 
his arms.  It felt good to hold her again.  "I miss you."  he 
whispered.  "We made a good team." 
    Scully closed her eyes, listening to his soft-spoken words. 
She missed him, too.  The last time she was this close to him 
was their last and only night together.  "I've got to get back. 
Robin will wondered what happened to me."  Scully pulled away 
from him.  
    "Right."  Mulder caressed her cheek gently before moving 
back.  
    "Fox?"  Diana called. 
    Mulder turned around to see her coming around the corner. 
"Are you ready?"  She touched his hand.  "Let's go home."  
    "Good bye."  he said softly in Scully's direction.  
    Scully remained outside for a few moments watching them drive 
off before heading back inside.

****
Scully's apartment
Atlanta, GA 

    Scully wondered if she should have seen Mulder before leaving 
the DC area.  A half hour for lunch or just a cup of coffee to catch
up on the past six months.  She probably would have done just that
if Fowley had not been with him or is she hadn't of made it 
abundantly clear that she and Mulder were together.  
   Our table.  Let's go home.
    Scully wondered how long their affair had been going on.  Did 
it start after she left the FBI?  Before?  She didn't want to 
think that Mulder could be with Fowley one night and the next 
night make love to her.  
    It was so hard imaging them together.  Scully didn't trust her 
and wished she worked harder to convince Mulder of that before 
leaving the Bureau.  Mulder could get caught up in something he 
would not be able to handle, professionally and personally.
    Why couldn't it have been someone else Mulder was in a 
relationship with?  They weren't right for each other.  A nice, 
sweet woman.  However, that type wouldn't be able to put up 
with his dark, brooding demeanor and obsessive need to find the
truth.  
    She could.  She understood.  
    Scully worried about Mulder so much that she almost forgot 
she and Chris were going to dinner tonight.

****


"I am dealing with a man 
When away from me . . . stays deep inside my heart"

    Chris had been dating Scully for almost five months now. 
He thought he was falling in love with her.  She had opened up 
to him more these past few weeks, telling him about her cancer and 
its subsequent remission.  He now understood a little more how 
important her work was to her, often working long hours and sometimes
weekends.  She was a perfectionist, almost to a fault, probably stemming 
from her medical training.  
    Dana was very analytical.  She had an explanation for every science
related question or problem he didn't know.  He found that very sexy - 
how smart she was.  Why didn't other men notice this? Notice the 
beauty and brains combination that he found so irresistible. 
    She didn't talk too much about her previous relationships, only 
says it was hard for her to form emotional attachments with people,
especially men.  Chris figured that meant she was never engaged or 
close to getting married.  
    The fact that she couldn't have children didn't bother him.  
He felt he wasn't cut out for raising children.  It was a huge 
responsibility - one that you had to be sure of before even considering
trying to conceive.  The idea of a child appealed, but not the 
responsibilities that go along with it. 
    Chris remembered the night she told him. Dana was so afraid he
wouldn't understand and break off the relationship.  She told him 
now that she couldn't conceive a child she wanted to have one even 
more.  It was the first time he'd seen her visibly upset.  He held and 
comforted her until she was her usual calm and in control self. 
    He believed they could have a future together, but he still 
felt she was holding back something from him. She already told 
him about the cancer and her inability to have children.  So he 
couldn't understand what it could be.  Perhaps a man in her past that
hurt her.  It wouldn't be about her work at the FBI, would it? 
He was curious about that and she told him a few stories about 
murder cases she and her partner solved, but beyond that he was
relatively clueless.  Occasionally, Dana would tell him certain things
were confidential and she couldn't confirm or deny any information.  
For him, that only added to her mystique and charm. 
    Chris didn't want to lose her.  He wanted to move their relationship
to another level.  
    "Dana, are you awake?"  Chris moved closer to her in the bed,
stroking her hair lightly. 
    She mumbled something, but he couldn't quite make it out.  Scully 
rolled over and kissed gave him a good morning kiss. 
    "Can I talk to you about something?" 
    "Sure, what's up?"  Scully asked. 
    "We've been seeing each other for awhile and I wanted to ask 
you . . . you something."  He was nervous, wondering how she'd
react. 
    "What?"  Scully sat up in bed facing him.
    "Would you move in with me?" 
    Scully just stared at him not ready for the question this early 
in the morning.  "Move in with you?"
    "My place is closer to work than yours.  All that traffic on 
400 isn't fun." He tried to appeal to her logical side.
    "That's not the point."  Scully answered, getting out of bed and
pulling her robe on.  "What brought this on?" 
    "Everything's been going so well for us, Dana.  I want to spend
more time together."  
    "Me, too."  she replied. "Moving in together is a big step, Chris."
    "I know it is, but I hardly see you except for weekends and 
sometimes every other weekend.  I miss you." 
    The last man to tell her that was Mulder.  He missed her so 
much that he made love to her before they said good bye. She
shouldn't be thinking about this, especially now. "I miss you, too,
but . . ." 
    "Just think about it, you don't have to answer now.  I care about
you so much, Dana."  Chris wrapped his arms around her waist. 
"I don't want to lose you."  He kissed her softly on the forehead. 

****
CDC Headquarters
Atlanta, GA 

    Scully had thought of nothing but Chris' offer the rest of the 
weekend.  She wasn't sure she was ready to make that kind of a
commitment.  Their relationship moved along quickly, which made
her a little wary, but she wasn't getting and younger plus she wanted
to make up for lost time of not having a social life.  
    They were together almost every weekend.  Dinner. Movies.
Plays.  Theatre.  She and Chris got along very well together. They
talked. *Really* talked.  About growing up.  Each other's family.
Hopes and dreams for the future.  The kind of conversation she 
never had with any other man and never expected to.  She was 
happy or maybe she tried to convince herself she was to make it 
easier. 
    Scully's time was still heavily devoted to her work and she knew 
that bothered Chris, but old habits die hard.  This was distracting 
her all morning from her work and even now eating a sandwich 
at her desk, she was more confused than ever.  
    /He's a wonderful man who wants to be with you/
    /You're the one who wanted a normal life, Dana./ 
    "Dana, what's wrong?"  Robin was standing inside the doorway 
of her office holding a can of Coke from lunch. 
    "Nothing, I'm fine."  she replied. 
    "C'mon, I'm not falling for that."  she walked over and pulled 
up a chair next to Scully.  "Tell me."  
    "It's complicated.  This isn't the place to talk about it." she 
admitted, throwing the remnants of her lunch in the garbage 
underneath her desk.  
    "Ok, then how about tonight.  At my place." Robin offered. 
    "I . . . umm . . ."  Scully began. 
    "Oh, I forgot the girls are having some friends over.  We'd 
have no privacy." 
    "I understand."  Scully tried not to sound relieved. 
    "I'll just come over your place, then." she stated.  "I'll bring
take out or something, Ok?"
    "Robin, I . . . " 
    "I'm not taking no for an answer.  I'll see you at 6:30." 
    "Ok."  Scully mumbled. 
    "It will all work out.  Don't worry."  Robin said quietly. 
    Scully wished she could believe her friend's words.  

****
Mulder's apartment
Alexandria, VA 

    "Fox, c'mon let's do something."  Diana wined.  "It's Saturday
night."  This relationship wasn't going as she had planned.  It 
was just like the first go round, all work and no play.
    "I didn't realize it was my job to entertain you." Mulder snapped.
    "Well, I'm sorry I wanted to have some fun." she stated. "Are 
you just going to sit on that couch brooding all night." 
    "No, I'm going to watch TV, too."  he remarked. 
    "This isn't working."  she commented. 
    "Then leave." Mulder told her.
    "You haven't been the same since you saw Scully months ago at the
restaurant."  Diana admitted. 
    "What the hell is that suppose to mean?" Mulder looked up from 
the program he was watching.  
    "You keep waiting for her to come back to you." She hit a nerve 
with that remark and that was her intention.  "You say her name in 
your sleep."  
    "That's ridiculous. No, I don't."  His attention went back to the
screen.  
    "I bet you wish you were fucking her instead of me." Diana stated.
    Mulder clicked the television off and started to leave the room, 
but she wasn't giving up so easily. 
    "The truth hurts, doesn't it?"  Diana began standing in front
of him at the threshold to the kitchen, "She left you and you need
to accept that.  She doesn't want you." 
    Mulder looked at Diana, knowing she was deliberately trying 
to hurt him and wondering why.  She was wrong, Scully *wanted* 
him  - at least for one night.  
    "I have accepted that." he lied. 
    "Sure you have." Diana muttered under her breath before slamming
the door. 
    Mulder hated that she was right. He sank to the floor sobbing 
quietly.

****
Scully's apartment
Atlanta, GA 

    Robin arrived on time and brought with her a hot, steaming 
pizza from Pizza Hut.  Scully didn't know what she was going to
bring and she set the table anyway, not thinking of pizza.  
    "I didn't realize you went to all that trouble. I should've called 
and told I was planning on pizza."  Robin apologized. 
    "No, that's all right. It smells wonderful."  Scully commented.
    Both women sat down and had a couple pieces of pizza before
Scully began her story.  They talked about work and family to 
fill in for the uncomfortable silence.  
    Scully started at the very beginning, when she first was assigned
to be Mulder's partner.  She proceeded to tell Robin about some of
their more normal cases and then her abduction and subsequent 
cancer from the effects of their tests.  
    Scully could tell her friend was having a hard time with all this
information all at once.  She couldn't tell if Robin believed her, 
but it felt good to talk with someone about it.  Scully did leave 
out the part about Antarctica because *she* was still having 
difficulty with that herself and needed more time with it.  
    "The two of you had interesting jobs, to say the least." Robin
commented, taking another sip of her Coke. 
    Scully smiled.  "That's one way to put it."  
    "Does this have something to do with Mulder?" 
    "Yes."  Scully admitted.  "I told you how close we were and 
how he was always there for me.  Very supportive of me." 
    Robin nodded.  "And?" 
    "He was devastated that I was leaving.  That I took another
job.  He saw it as I was leaving him, part of that was in fact true,
but I needed a change.  Something was missing."
    "It was hard for us to say good bye.  He helped me pack up 
my apartment and we hugged each other.  I thought that was it, but 
the next evening he shows up at my hotel room, telling me if I was
happy that's all he cared about.  We started kissing and ended up
making . . . making love."
    "You didn't want to?" 
    "It just happened so quickly.  I was scared of leaving him, too. 
I had thought about us becoming lovers a few times, but figured
it would complicate our work.  I guess he didn't share those feelings."
Scully explained.  
    "It sounds like he cares for you very much."
    "Then why didn't he tell me earlier?  Why wait until I left to
show me?  I don't understand how he could . . ."  Scully broke off,
trying to keep her tears at bay.  She got up from the table, 
embarrassed for Robin to see her like this.  
    "Dana, it's all right."  Robin hugged Scully.  "It's all right."
    Scully wiped away the tears.  "Chris wants me to move in with 
him.  I don't know what to do.  I care about him, I really do." 
    "But you need to know."  Robin concluded.  "How Mulder feels
about that night."  
    "I know.  We couldn't really talk about it at the restaurant." 
she replied.  "I wasn't ready, anyway." 
    "That was him?"  Robin was surprised. 
    "How did you know?"  Scully shot back. 
    "He was only the best-looking man there."  she admitted.  
"Actually, I noticed the two of you as I walked by the window to
the restroom."  
    Scully laughed.  "Best-looking man."  
    "Why is that so funny?"  Robin asked.  "You've obviously 
noticed, too." 
    "It wasn't like that with us.  Our relationship has always been
based on trust than anything else." Scully stated.  "I care about 
him so much." 
    "I need to know if there could be something between us. A 
relationship beyond partners. Beyond anything I hoped possible." 
she divulged.  
    "I think there could be.  I think the two of you have something
special.  Something you have to fight for."  Robin commented. 
   "It's not that simple.  He's involved with someone."  Scully 
said.  "Someone who isn't right for him." 
    "Maybe he's not with her anymore.  Maybe he realized that." 
Robin tried to sound hopeful.  
    "Perhaps."  Scully mumbled.  "I really want to see him again."
    "Call him."  Robin suggested.  
    "I need to do more than that."  Scully answered.  "I have to 
see him.  I have to."  

*****
    Scully called Mulder the following evening.  He answered 
the phone, surprised to hear her voice after so long.    
    "I need to talk with you."  she said matter-of-factly.
    "Sure, go ahead." Mulder replied, wondering what she could 
possibly want.  
    "No . . . not over the phone.  In person.  What about this 
weekend?  Would that be Ok?"  
    "Yes.  I . . . Sure it would be fine."  Mulder replied.  "Scully,
what . . ." 
    "I'll call you when I'm in town."  Scully hung up, already 
anxious about the visit.  

****


"Lightning strikes
Maybe once, maybe twice
And it all comes down to you."

    Scully told Chris she was going to visit a friend out of town.
She didn't give him many details and was unsure if he even believed
her, but wasn't ready to explain Mulder to him just yet.  
    Chris was disappointed because it was another weekend without 
her again.  It was either work or something else.  He still thought 
she was keeping something about her personal life from him.  
    Scully called Mulder on her cell phone ten minutes before she
arrived at his apartment.  She was anxious walking down the hallway
to his door.  
    Mulder opened the door after she knocked only once.  She looked
great dressed in jeans and a dark shirt.  So casual.  So different.  
    "Hi," she mumbled, walking into his apartment after all these 
months. 
    "How was your flight?"  Mulder asked. 
    "Ok, I guess."  Scully sat down on the couch, looking up at him.
These exchanges of pleasantries weren't going to make what she had
come to say easier, just prolong it.
    For the first time, Mulder was uncomfortable in her presence.  
He felt like he had done something wrong and she was about to 
punish him for it.  Sitting down on the opposite side of the couch,
he waited for her say something. 
    "Mulder, "  she began.  "I met someone in Atlanta that I care 
about.  He -" 
    "Scully, you don't have to do this."  Mulder interrupted, fearing
she was going to embarrass herself.
    "No, Mulder.  I need to tell you this."  Her voice was shaky, 
as if she was going to cry any minute. "It could lead to something
permanent." Scully paused, looking down at the floor. "But I need
to know if I wasn't leaving . . . would we have made love that night."
    "I don't know."  Mulder answered.  "I've been asking myself the
same thing, Scully." 
    "What do you mean you don't know?" She tried not to get upset.
"I need a better answer than that." 
    "So it was just your way of saying good bye, Mulder?  Is that it?"
    "No.  No."  Mulder said.  "You left me, Scully." 
    "No, I left the X-Files." she snapped.
    "The X-Files *is* my life, Scully." he stated.  "You should
 know that by now." 
    "That's not the issue.  If I wasn't leaving the Bureau, would we 
have spent the night together?  Was this your way of trying to get 
me to stay?"  she accused.
    "I didn't have an ulterior motive, Scully.  I was having a hard 
time accepting you were leaving."  he confessed.
    "Was it just going to be one night, Mulder?" 
    "No, of course not." 
    "So, there might have been . . . something more between us." 
    "Yes, there could be." Mulder told her. 
    "But, it's too late."  Scully got up from the couch, turning 
her back to him.  "You're with *her* now.  Agent Fowley." 
    "No, I'm not."  he responded.  "It didn't work out. Scully, 
look at me." 
    She ignored his request, happy to hear that they were no longer
together. "How long did it go on?  I mean were you involved with
her when we . . ." 
    Mulder touched her hand.  "No, Scully, no.  I wouldn't do that 
to you.  I wouldn't hurt you like that." 
    "I didn't think so, but I wasn't sure . . . "
    Mulder noticed she looked like she was going to collapse any 
minute from emotional exhaustion.  From all this she had been 
holding in all this time they were apart.  He held her close, stroking
her hair soothingly.  It sounded like she said "I missed you," but 
couldn't tell through her tears.  
    Scully wrapped her arms around his waist tightly.  This is what
she was missing.  They never had time to begin a relationship. 
This felt much different than Chris hugging her.  It had more 
passion, more need to it.  Like the night they made love.  
    She thought about that so much before she met Chris.  How 
good it felt to have Mulder's mouth on her skin.  His lips on her
neck, her breasts, leaving a trail of wetness on her flushed skin. 
It felt so good, so good . . . She held him tighter as those memories
came flooding back.  
    Mulder pressed his lips against her neck.  She tilted her head
to give him better access as his mouth continued its journey down
her throat.  
    They were getting carried away and Scully hadn't even finished 
what she wanted to tell him.  "Mulder . . . wait, I need to . . ."
    "Sorry."  he moved away, sitting back down on the couch. "I'm 
sorry."  
    "About Chris -" Scully said.
    "The guy you met?" 
    "Yes."
    "What about us, Scully?"  Mulder asked.  "There's still something
between us. Look what just happened." 
    "There always was, Mulder.  This part is just new.  More intense."
she claimed. 
    Mulder nodded.  "I know." 
    "I'm going to have to make a choice." 
    "Scully, if you want to be with this guy and you care about him,
I'll understand.  You deserve that.  You, more than anyone deserve 
to have a normal life.  You should be with him." Mulder said.  
"Not here with me,"  he added. 
    Scully was touched by his words.  "I don't know what to do." she
admitted.  "I just don't know."  She sat down next to him.  He 
pulled her into his arms.  They held each other for a long time. 

****
    Scully ended up spending the night at Mulder's place. She filled
him in about her job at the CDC and how much she enjoyed the 
work and her coworkers and friends. Exhausted, she fell asleep
with him on the couch.  
    Scully didn't say much about Chris, knowing Mulder wouldn't 
want to hear about her lover.  However, he told her again that 
he would understand whatever decision she ended up making.  She 
was more confused than ever.  Mulder cared about her and wanted
to continue where they left off almost a year ago, but it would have
to be a long distance relationship.  Could they do that? It was hard 
making time for Chris with her work and they were in the same 
state.  
    "It seems all we've been saying to each other is good bye." Mulder
commented when she was about to leave for the airport.  
    "I know."  
    "I'll call you when I get in."  she promised. 
    Mulder kissed her softly.  "I miss you already." he whispered.
    This was just like before. "Good bye."  she breathed.

****  
    "What's bothering you?"  Chris asked as they sat down to 
dinner at Scully's place.  She had been withdrawing from him 
emotionally and he feared this was the beginning of the end unless
things improved drastically. 
    "Nothing. Why?" she asked. It had almost been three weeks since
she got back from seeing Mulder.  She still didn't know what to 
do, but she missed Mulder so much.  Missed talking with him.  That
us against the world thing they had going on.  She even missed arguing
with him.
    "Are you seeing someone else?"
    "What's that supposed to mean?" Scully didn't expect him to accuse
her of being unfaithful.  
    "You've been preoccupied these past days and I wish you would 
tell me what it's about."  Chris explained.  
    "That friend I told you I was going to see - it was Mulder." she
admitted.  "I had to talk with him about something."
    "Is there something going on between the two of you?" 
    Scully suddenly lost her appetite and left the table. "I don't
know. Not really."
    "That's not an answer." Chris replied, following her into the
living room.  
    "It's hard to explain.  We've been through so much together."
Scully didn't know how Chris was going to understand this.
    "Are you sleeping with him, Dana?"  
    "No."  she said.  "He said there could be something between us."
    "That's great."  Chris muttered.  "I thought you left that job 
because you wanted a change.  Maybe he's just saying that so you
will come back."
    "No, he wouldn't do that -"
    Chris shook his head.  "I don't know, Dana.  He might."
    "No, he wouldn't.  You don't even know him, so how can you 
stand there and judge him?"  Scully didn't want to fight with him,
didn't want it to happen this way.  
    "Mulder and I have a history together.  We've know each other 
for seven years.  We've been through so much."  she cried.  "You
couldn't possibly understand." 
    "Thanks for your faith in me."  he pointed out.  "Thanks."  
Chris walked to the door. 
    "No, wait -"
    "I'll make this decision easier for you.  I'm leaving.  Good
bye, Dana."  Chris slammed the door.  

****
    Scully tried unsuccessfully to reach Chris for two days.  
She left too many messages on his machine, asking him to call her
anytime - day or night.
    Robin already knew about what happened when she went to see
Mulder, but now Scully called her telling her about Chris.  
    "I didn't want it to be like this." Scully said.  "Him mad at me,
leaving angry." 
    "Break-ups are never easy." Robin commented. "How did you expect
him to react?"  
    "I don't know.  I guess it's really over now."   Scully admitted.
    "Did you tell Mulder?"  she asked.
    "No, not yet.  I wanted to tell him in person."  Scully replied.
    "I want to see him so much.  I miss him."  
    "Then go.  Surprise him."  
    "Surprise him?"  
    "Get on a plane.  You could be at his place in a few hours." 
Robin encouraged. 
    "Here's what you should do: Take a late flight and, well, wait -
do you have a key to his apartment?"
    "Yes."
    "Good. Then sneak into his place and crawl into bed with him
preferably with little or no clothes on and . . . "
    "Robin, I can't do that.  That's not me.  He knows I wouldn't do
something like that."  
    "That's exactly why you should do it." Robin stressed.
    "I don't know."  
    "Think about it."  Robin said.  "I have to go.  See you later." 
    "Ok. Bye." 
    Scully thought about her friend's advice and decided she was 
going to do it.  Be spontaneous. She was about ready to leave 
for the airport when someone was at the door. 
    "Chris?" Scully was surprised.  He was the last person she 
expected to see.
    He walked in, seeing her suitcase on the floor ready to go. 
"You're going to see *him.* He made it sound like she was committing
a crime.  
    "Yes, I am." she replied.  "I left you messages.  I didn't think 
you'd call back."
    "I was angry at you.  I didn't know how deeply attached you were
to this man. I can see it in your eyes.  It must have been hard for
you to move down here." Chris didn't want to be angry with Dana,
but it was hard losing her.  "I guess I came over to say good bye
and  . . . "
    Scully interrupted him with a hug.  "Good bye."  she said 
softly.  
    "Be good." He returned the hug, letting his arms linger around
her one last time.  

****
Mulder's apartment
Alexandria, VA

    Scully couldn't believe she was doing this.  It was almost 
one o'clock in the morning and she was sneaking in Mulder's 
apartment as quietly as possible.  Setting her suitcase down in 
the foyer, she found him asleep on the couch.  Big surprise. 
    She kissed him gently on the forehead and sat beside him, 
taking off her coat and kicking her shoes off.  Scully felt too
uncomfortable to start undressing.  Sorry, Robin she thought to 
herself, I just can't go through with it. 
    Mulder stirred, opening his eyes. "Am I dreaming?" he mumbled.
    "No, I'm really here." she answered, kissing him again. 
    Mulder pulled her on top of him, returning her kisses much more
passionately.  
    "Are you sure it's not a dream."  he reiterated.  "Because I want
you to be here in the morning." He ran his hands up and down her 
back, caressing it through her shirt. "Not here.  In the bedroom."
    "You'll have to show me.  I've never been there." Scully remarked,
reaching for his hand.  
    They walked down a small dark hallway and he flipped the light on.
"Sorry, it's a little messy."  Mulder swiped a bunch of papers and 
half empty boxes onto the floor.
    Scully noticed how Spartan the room looked. Besides the bed, 
there was a dresser and closet, but that was all the furniture.  His
clothes were either in the closet or strewn all over the floor.  The
bed looked like it hadn't been slept in in weeks. 
    He kept apologizing for the state of his bedroom, but it didn't 
matter to Scully.  "Mulder, it's Ok."  she soothed, running her 
hand over his arm.  "It's Ok." 
    Turning to her, he began kissing her, not believing she was 
really here with him.  His hands worked on the buttons of her shirt,
then slipped it off her shoulders. 
    "Mulder . . ." she said softly as he worked on sliding her pants
over her hips and off her body until she was standing there in her 
bra and panties.  He whispered her name and she leaned closer to 
as he drew her onto the bed with him. 
    Mulder's hands and lips were all over her making her gasp and
moan.  Tangling her hands in his hair, Scully pressed her body 
closer to him until she felt her skin against his. She wanted 
nothing more than his body on top of hers pressing it down onto the
mattress making her forget everything but the two of them; Mulder's  
body inside of hers.  
    All through this, Mulder kept thinking she chose me.  Scully 
wants to be with me. This beautiful woman who could have anything
she wants chose me. He felt her hands pulling him close.  Her soft,
small body against his.  Mulder wanted nothing more than to be inside
of her.
    Scully snuggled close to him afterwards, feeling complete, 
satisfied.  Quenched. 
    "You're here.  You're really here."  Mulder murmured, relief 
tinged his words. 
    "Yes. I can't believe it either."  she answered. 
    "You're here."  he whispered.  "Here."  Mulder wrapped his arms
around her waist from behind.
    Scully felt his lips against her ear. His ragged breaths next to 
her skin.  She closed her eyes, listening to the sound of his 
whispered words feeling more content than she had been in a very
long time. 

****
    They continued to see each other almost every weekend for 
close to three months.  Neither of them had said anything about 
the distance, fearing it would take the passion out of the affair 
they were having.  
    Sometimes they would stay in all weekend, savoring their 
precious time together.  It was never long enough.  Scully didn't 
want to leave on Sunday and Friday didn't come soon enough. 
    One weekend, Mulder said something unusual to her. 
    "Scully, do you ever think about just leaving your life for 
good?" 
    "What do you mean?  I'm not sure I understand." They were in his 
bedroom, getting ready for bed.  
    "Just going away where no one would find you.  Starting over 
as someone else.  Reinventing yourself as someone you hoped to 
be when you were young." he explained. 
    "No. That sounds lonely, Mulder." 
    "I have. Many times." he confessed.  "But not anymore."
    "Why?" Scully asked.
    "Not unless you'd come with me.  I don't want to be without you."
he answered. 
    Scully didn't expect that.  She turned to face him, his words 
touching her heart.  
    Mulder stepped closer to her.  She was leaning against his bed,
dressed in her pajama top.  He ran his hands up her thighs, raising 
the shirt.  Kneeling down, he pressed his lips against her stomach,
just above the lace on her panties.  
    She gasped as his mouth moved lower. "Mulder. . ." she moaned.

****
    The next morning, Scully found a memo on Mulder's kitchen 
table.  It was from Skinner informing him of the closing of the 
X-Files, dated three weeks ago.  Apparently, Agent Fowley had 
taken a position overseas profiling terrorists, similar to her old 
job.  Scully surmised  from the letter that Mulder was not allowed
to work on the X-files unsupervised.  He had been re-assigned to
the Violent Crimes Section.  
    Scully felt a wave of guilt wash over her.  She wasn't here, so 
the X-Files were shut down again.  If she had stayed with the FBI,
they could still be investigating them.  Mulder must blame her for
their recent shut down.  
    "Good morning."  Mulder greeted her with a gentle kiss on the
cheek.  She was sitting at the kitchen table.  "Do you want some
coffee?" 
    Mulder obviously didn't realize what she was her attention was 
focused on.  "Why didn't you tell me about this?"  
    "What?  Oh, that."  he replied.  "It never came up." 
    "Mulder, the X-Files have been shut down." 
    "I know.  I'm back in the VCS." he commented.
    "Don't be flippant."  Scully answered.  "I'm sorry . . . I've 
been thinking of coming back.  Now I need to. Definitely."
    "No, you don't Scully.  You have a job.  I'm fine."  Mulder 
sat down next to her. 
    "Mulder, who told me the X-Files was his life?" she reminded
him.  
   "See, this is why I didn't want to tell you.  I don't want you
to do this."  he answered.  "I know how much you love your work.
You've told me."
    "We're wrapping  up something now.  I could be down here in a 
couple weeks, a month tops."  
    "No, don't."  
    "Mulder, I don't understand.  We could see each other every day.
Be with each other all the time.  Aren't you getting tired of this 
long distance relationship?" 
    "It's not too bad."  he replied.  "We see each other enough."
    "Dammit, Mulder, where the hell is this coming from?!" Scully 
walked over to him.   
    "Scully, you love your work.  I don't want you to give that up 
for me." he stated.  
    Scully couldn't be happy knowing the X-Files were taken away from
him.  Mulder couldn't be happy with his life's work gone. She cared 
for him too much.  "I love you more than the work, Mulder."  she 
cried.  "I love you more.  Much more."  She closed her eyes, letting
the tears fall down her cheeks.  
    "Scully . . ." Mulder held her tightly. "I love you, too.  I 
want you back here with me. I need you."   
    
****
CDC Headquarters
Atlanta, GA

    Scully had turned in her notice to her supervisor that she was 
leaving.  Before she did so, she called Skinner and told him she 
would like to come back and made sure the X-Files would be re-opened
contingent on her status as an FBI employee.  She wanted to make 
sure they would both be able to work on them together like before. 
    "I'm going to miss you, Dana."  Robin told her.  It was the end
of Scully's last day here at work.
    "Me, too."  Scully said.  "We'll keep in touch.  Calls, letters,
e-mail."
    "I know, but it won't be the same."  Robin admitted.  "I can 
tell you're happier since you've made this decision."
    "I am.  I'll miss it here, but I want to be back with Mulder.
Like before."  Scully remarked.  
    "Then it was good you took this job. It was a test in a way to
see if the two of you could be apart."  she pointed out. "Now you
know he's the one you're meant to be with."  
    Scully smiled and hugged her friend good bye. 

****
FBI Headquarters
Washington, D.C.

    Scully made her way down the stairs to the basement.  She was
dressed not in her usual dark attire, but a deep purple dress that 
reached just above her ankles, her badge clipped to the lapel.  It 
felt good to be back here.  She just got back to town last night
and was staying at a hotel since she didn't have a place to live
yet, but confident she could persuade Mulder into letting her 
stay with him for awhile.  
    Mulder's door was partially opened and she pushed it open 
all the way.  He looked up from the desk and smiled at her.  
    "I hear you're looking for a partner."  she said. 

****
END 

Author's Note:  Thanks for staying with me through this whole
saga.  This is the longest fic I've ever written. I'm not sure if I'll
do it again.  I feel like I've been working on this forever.  So, 
how was it? Let me know your thoughts. -Lisa