Star Gazing
By RocketMan

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Content: MSR!!!!!! This is full blown so you non
shippers head for the hills!

Author's Notes: This is rated P. No sex. No violence.
Something I can show my parents if they ask what I've
been doing on the computer all night. But don't leave.
It'll be worth your while. =-}

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"It's just hovering there, on the edge of the horizon,
like a swollen lightning bug," she said quietly,
indicating with a nod the yellow full moon watching
them.

"A lightning bug?" he questioned.

"Firefly."

"Oh."

Mulder turned his face back to the night sky and peered
intently into the black void, as if the stars' distances
could reveal to him the secrets of life, or unlock the
mysteries of the woman beside him.

Scully kept her blue eyes on the brightness of the moon,
preferring its light to the the darkness that encompassed
the stars, swallowing up their inadequate light.

The pupils of her eyes, he noticed, could barely be
distinguished from the blue, turned black by the sky
above them, just as the stars seemed to melt into the
dark. But the yellow of the moon was also mirrored there,
to make her eyes seem catlike if he didn't look too hard.

Mulder leaned against the hood of his car, stretching his
neck up to meet the gaze of the stars, easily picking out
Ursa Minor from the North Star and its sister constellation,
Ursa major. Then Hercules, Leo, and . . . Cancer. How
ugly that a constellation would have the name of
something so invading, so cruel and heartless.

To him, the stars were friendly mythical creatures that
held hope for Samantha's return, but to Scully, they were
white and cold, little tears in the absolute darkness.

They had once been friends, when her father had shown
her the sky and the telescope, but they had turned to
enemies, giving her pain and grief and missing months.

She shuddered and returned her gaze to the moon. It was
hanging heavily in the sky, pregnant with yellow light,
and illuminating the shrouded world like a child's
nightlight. Calm, comforting, remiding her of mother's
promises.

"Mulder?" she asked.

"Yeah?" His voice came suddenly, from right beside her
and she was thrown back into reality.

"How come the stars have always been looked to for
guidance, for religious significance?"

He sighed and rolled his head to see her better. "Maybe
because they are a testimony to something greater than
ourselves, some higher power, some greater good, that
calls us to seek meaning in our lives."

"What testimony do you see in them?"

Scully watched his lips move before he began to speak,
seeing how they were bright with moonlight then dark
with night.

"I see that there are things I will never know, things I
cannot comprehend. But that I should not give up because
of that, only that I should strive further on, to attain
all that I can."

Scully leaned back next to him on the hood and turned
her face suddenly to him. "Do you believe the future is
written in the stars?" she asked.

He cocked his head. "Do you?"

"No. Why would the stars care about humans? They have their
own private universe out there and we are such a small part
of it. The stars would not align themselves just to suit
one tiny species. Humans have always been rather egocentric."

He nodded and said, "Well, I don't think my future is mapped
out for me by millions of cohesive balls of gas and vapor. But
I think that the stars give us wisdom, if only to show us that
there are things out there besides ourselves."

She sighed. How had it changed into a talk about EBE's?

"Scully?"

"Yes, Mulder?"

"Wouldn't it be nice to be a star when you die?"

She trembled and he felt her quivering beside him.

"Scully?"

But she said nothing, so he put his arms around her and
rocked her, like he would a small child who was afraid of
the dark.

"I don't want to die, Mulder. Even if I were a star --" Her own
sudden sobbing cut her off.

He continued to rock her and smoothed her hair, feeling its
softness glide through his fingers like butterfly wings.

"I'm here, Scully. I'm here," he murmured because he did not
have the heart to tell her she wouldn't die. He couldn't make
empty promises.

"Mulder ..." She seemed to whimper in his arms and very
lightly, he placed a kiss on her lips, wet with her tears.

She sighed and shut her eyes, relaxing against him, as if his
kiss had drained all her strength.

"Scully?" he whispered.

She opened her eyes hesitantly and he leaned forward and kissed
her nose, gingerly. This time she gave him a half smile and a shy
look. With her bright hair and pale face, mixing with shiny tears,
she could already be a star, long dead and gone. He swallowed the
lump in his throat and buried his face in her hair.

She turned to him and kissed his cheek, then his lips, until he
was filled with the same heat as a sun gone nova.

"Scully," he whispered and she looked in his eyes, dark with
swirling emotion, dark like the night sky.

"I love you." she said.

His eyes sparked, a shooting star across the sky's darkness.

She took his hands and entwined her fingers with his.

"I love you, Scully, even when, even when, you do become a
star."

She looked back to the sky. "You said the stars told you there
were things you'd never know, that there are things besides
ourselves. I think the stars just told me who else was here."

And Mulder realized that he had been watching her as she
spoke -- star gazing.

~~~~
End. Not too sappy, I hope?
Adios
RocketMan