Ummm...this is a story about e-mail and poetry, inspired halfway by GreenFish's two and halfway by our school Literary Magazine, from which I got all these great poems. So just read it and think of the poems and... I'll shut up and get started now. E-mail Poetry RocketMan Disclaimer: Okay, I have the poems' authors when they come up, but once again they are not mine. Not mine. And of course, neither is Mulder or Scully, I just decided to steal them for a little bit. No, no, not steal. Borrow is the word. (If I could have them, I'd take them.) Distribute: Go ahead, make my day. Rating: G Content: I really don't think it's ..... I mean it's fluff, basically. Spoiler: I'm going to be careful and say fourth season, though anyone could read it and it wouldn't spoil anything. Classification: MSR-oh yeah... Summary: I did that up there, didn't I? Oh well. Author's Notes: This isn't really all that great, just nice for shippers and poets. Or those waxing poetic. ============= E-mail Poetry ============= Mulder finished typing on his computer and clicked on the Send icon, watching as the message box at the bottom connected to the e-mailman. He wondered if the e-mailman had to wear a uniform, or if there were thousands of them in one huge room, all with cramps in their legs and aches in their backs. He wondered why you never heard of e-mailmen going crazy and killing a bunch of people, if they sat behind computers all day. He also wondered if he had done the right thing. ===== Dana Scully saw the Mail icon flash at the top left, ever the little apple, and sighed. If it was Frohike again, she'd ... she'd be mad. She had just gone through a hundred messages already; what happens when you go away for a while and don't check them, and she was sick of it. But she dutifully clicked on the Get Mail Now icon and waited as the message loaded. It was from Mulder and she smiled to herself, a bit surprised, and a bit dreading whatever he had to tell her. They'd had an argument, maybe he was trying to make up? ===== "Mulder, get off it! He didn't take her anywhere! She says he didn't, he says he didn't, and you're not getting anywhere by insisting --" "Scully! Stop it! Just stop it, okay? You can believe their lies if you want to, but I won't!" "Mulder ... let's just go home ... please ... " "You go ahead, but I'm staying here to find the truth, in case you've forgotten your job description!" ===== That had been a terrible argument, but she had stayed and helped him, and he had been wrong, but she had tried to forget and push it away. But it was always there, drawing a veil between them since they'd gotten back. The message said: >>Scully- Can't figure what went wrong.<< And there was a poem attached, and she read it slowly, to catch all of it. She hadn't been very good at explicating poems in high school English. >>cargo by Chad Nixon i watch you walking off to your car fists clenched in some frustration about my stupid, stupid actions - i will take it back a million times but it's there and it's right and i'm happy in its immobility you should be so angry you don't understand the way i lie in bed waiting for the sun to go away and night to tell me "sleep, sleep."<< Scully sighed and thought just how accurately it described him. Even when he was apologizing he wasn't backing down from his beliefs; he still thought he was right. And she had to learn how to accept that. And of course he would wait at night, for the brightness to go away and darkness to envelop him and sleep to come. She needed to respond to him equally. Tell him she would play his little game and that she did understand. She did understand. ===== Scully spent thirty minutes searching through her books of poetry to find the same author Mulder had used, but instead found a different poem that caught her attention. >>Mulder- My anger is never because of you. Sometimes I really just don't want to see what I should be facing. Faith Shanelle Diaz Realization of the loss, a question of faith beyond the limits of fact or reason it lies in bed with intuition, it lies dormant while I need it most.<< Scully swallowed dryly and prayed Mulder was still online so that she could know his response. If he didn't send her something back, there was no way she would get any sleep that night. She waited thirty more minutes and just as she was about to quit out of Netscape, the message icon blinked cheerfully at her. She now understood the old phrase about killing the messanger in old days. If this was bad ... >>Scully, I wish I knew when faith had fallen asleep on us. I think I understand, I'd like to understand. Maybe this will give you the faith you seek. I Can Never Tell You Logan Khune I can tell you all my thoughts the second they cross my mind. I can tell you all about my past, all the things I've done. That I'm ashamed that I hurt from that I regret that I don't want to remember But there's one thing I can't tell you. I can tell you every joke and make you laugh. I can tell you a story and make you smile. I can tell you all my problems everything that's going wrong that I fear that I worry over that enrages me. But there is one thing I can't tell you. I can tell you all my dreams all my hopes all my nightmares. Of everything I know there is one thing I cannot tell you. I can never tell you how much you give to me to my life to my future. I can never tell you how much I want to give it back to you and live for you and hold onto you for something holds me back and I can never tell you.<< Dana felt her hand tremble as she read the poem, letting his voice fill her head as if he was right there reading it to her. He thought she gave so much to him, while in truth, if it weren't for him, she would have stopped long ago, she would have given up on herself and on finding the truth. She would have given up on life. Cancer equals death. Except when Mulder was around. She took out the book of contemporary poetry and felt as if she needed to get away from the heaviness, find something a little safer. What she sent him back, though, was anything but safe. >>Mulder- Thank you for all you have given me, the gift of faith and trust. You tell me every day what I mean, what my purpose is, what I can put my faith in. I guess I needed to hear it again. A Call To Robin Casey Childress In the dead of night the small alley in town, Some men approached me rabid and hunting for a feast. You appeared so quietly without a sound. The shadow of Batman the shadow of darkness So strong, so swift. Does Robin ever get to kiss the girl?<< ===== Mulder read it again, to make sure his eyes weren't playing cruel tricks on him, teasing him with things he desperately wanted to see. But there it was again -- "Does Robin ever get to kiss the girl?" >>Scully- Robin doesn't feel he's worthy enough to kiss the girl -- after all, he is the shadow of darkness. But he did get the chance once, when the girl was needing it, needing some comfort and someone to say she wasn't alone. But it was only on the forehead. Did he even realize? Did she? beautiful Chad Nixon hurt and silently bleeding as her kiss sits on my back- the way the lower lip stuck and peeled slowly off and i laughed because it all felt so good. we drove together and the words dripped from from your mouth i wanted it to stop i wanted to kiss you again- the way the lower lip stuck and curled into a smile and you were so beautiful too beautiful.<< Dana's breath caught in her throat and she blinked furiously to withold tears. He was right; it had all felt so good. She could remember every exact detail of that slight kiss on her forehead, the way he had placed his hands on the sides of her face and how the warmth in his lips had infused her with strength so much better than his words. They didn't realize. They hadn't realized that with every day they drew closer, more tightly bound to each other, a force to be reckoned with. >>Mulder- I didn't realize. Did you? Do we want the same things? Or is this safe enough to throw aside and forget the next day? Do you want to forget? Are the words that ineffectual, to allow us to forget? attempt Chad Nixon words are never perfect, they only hurt them- selves in existence. they never rhyme or link to form complete thoughts, nor exemplify what they hope to symbolize. it is in vain that i write this, the language is entirely limiting, that being the only reason I do.<< ===== Mulder finished reading the poem she had sent, attached with her questions and her open honesty. The message was not lost on him; words were inadequate to fully express everything that they had. It was too complex and intricate to properly explore and understand, let alone act upon. But he wanted to act. He was sick of standing beside her and letting the hurt and pain and joy and love be locked away inside where they would never talk about it again. >>Scully- Language can't express, yet we still try. Is it easier than face to face? Because somehow this is all unreal. Being around you ... it's like having someone to always understand me, even when I know you really don't. Here's all you need to understand. I don't want you hurt. And I seem to always hurt you anyway. That's it, and I don't think my brain fully realizes the implications of this yet. Is my heart playing a joke on me? joke Chad Nixon YOU LOOK i SO SAD AND FAR wanted AWAY. HE TOOK to SOMETHING FROM kiss YOU AND YOU BEGGED you. ME FOR IT BACK I BUT ALL I DID WAS wanted SMILE AND TAKE to YOU INTO MY ARMS kiss AND SAY "I'M SORRY" you.<< Scully's breath caught on the poem; she sucked in air and tried to pretend it didn't matter, that they could go back, but it was there and it was right, and she couldn't ignore it. The mantra. "I wanted to kiss you." She didn't want to ignore it anymore. And he realized now, didn't he, why he felt the way he did? >>Mulder- Mulder. You've given it back to me.<< One message, short, no poem, unsigned and yet when he read it, his blood ran hot and cold and he couldn't seem to get enough air in his lungs. She was saying out loud what had been said all along, but without the masks and the guises and the walls to hide behind. Scully saw her message light blinking and wondered what he could say to that, prayed he would say something to it. >>S- I'm coming. -M<< Her breath fell away and she hastily turned off her computer and snatched up some things off the floor and went and waited at the door. He was coming. The knock was soft and light and seemed almost hesitant, like the ride over had made him doubt. She opened it and stepped into his arms. "I had to come over, Scully. Before we both lost our courage." he whispered, a sound like wind on the sea. She was shaking in his arms, her courage long gone, and desire the only thing that kept her from running. "I'm glad you did," she said back, and he leaned closer to catch her words for they were so faint. Then he kissed her and said, "Sometimes Robin gets to kiss the girl."